I was just thinking about an old acquaintance. Her favorite topic was marriage. Every time we'd eat together she'd have books and magazine articles about making romance work. I said, "Romance isn't work." She said, "Yes, it is. If both people don't work hard enough it can't last." I picked up the implication, intended or assumed, that if I didn't do the same, my own marriage was doomed. (Hey, is this a poem? No? Okay.)
She made appointments to talk with her husband about their relationship. Sometimes I wondered how he felt about being treated as such a project. I'm glad I was already married, because that may have made me think... Love looked so difficult. But it's been ten years since I've spoken to her so as far as I know, they're fine. (And I truly hope they are.)
Maybe I'm naive in thinking if you give your heart, it's gave. It's not yours alone any more. Love won't lead you wrong.
Also, I highly recommend having a bad year. Have one. Then you'll know you can get though a bad year.
But I'll try not to let the striving become strife. Because if you have faith, you're 90% there. The flowers and cakes are just gravy. (Mmm, gravy cakes...)
We chose each other and as it turns out, we were both right. Even if he hates karaoke and my eyes glaze over when he talks about R/C servos, it's all good.
Obviosity: If your eyes glaze over... Wait a minute, give it another shot because technology is cool!
(Okay, I guess that obviosity isn't universal : )
------------------------------------ Mashup I am not going to make: "Love and Happiness" and "Try a Little Tenderness"
Friday on Good Morning America they had the mother and toddler who were kicked off a plane. Here's the story: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oO1f8MvSIZk I didn't see the GMA video posted but it was really cute how the toddler was climbing and crawling all over. One of the other reporters came up to help entertain him so the mother could talk to Diane Sawyer. My kids were fascinated. They'd never seen this much go wrong on TV, because fortunately we went to the kitchen to get a snack during the Superbowl.
I told them about when they were babies. My little one used to headbutt whenever he got happy so I made a hugging and singing game for him to help spare my head. : ) My big one never wanted to miss anything. Anything that ever happened he wanted to be in on the action. He hated to go to sleep lest he miss something. He'd cry for hours. After doing all I could to make sure everything was in order and he was comfortable, everytime he'd almost doze off, he'd start to cry all over again. I finally found a trick for him.
I'd take him really strange places. One night I carefully picked my way down the stairs to the basement. When he finally opened his eyes he took a breath and... silence. What in the world is this? He looked around for a while and stared at the ceiling and finally relaxed and dozed off. After a couple times, this didn't work anymore. Been there, done that.
So I took him out on the front porch. It worked, Yay! That worked a couple more times then the third time I was thinking, well maybe I'll have to try the backyard. Then, Yay! Something wonderful happened. The garbage truck arrived at the business next store. It was one of the big ones with the arms on top to pick up a dumpster. In the morning mist with its yellow lights and backup beeps and all the noise and the slow motion movement, it was the coolest thing ever. I'll never forget that morning.
Friday at work I was a little nervous because I was stretched a little thin so I went to lunch early. I wanted to eat healthier so I went to Subway. I walked in and thought, wow I haven't been here for a really long time. It's so different from the Subway near my house. Huh, this trick works on grownups, too! : )
Go someplace you haven't been to. Just a thought.
------------------------------------ Mashup I am not going to make: "My Baby Does the Hokey Pokey"
The problem is man is so good. We can imagine everything imaginable. We can make stories and make movies and make music and make buildings and make art. People's lives are saved at the hospital every day. There are sci fi stories about the robots battling their creators, Turing machines that don't believe in us. Are we giving ourselves a clue?
And of course we're wonderful now, with all the iPhones and the hive mind. But look back through time at how special we've always been. Especially bad sometimes, but still. Capable of everything imaginable. Is this a clue?
I think the candle holds me.
------------------------------------ Mashup I am not going to make (that would be a lovely bombastic montrosity): "On the Turning Away" and "Amazing Grace" (Scottish bagpipes)